Friday, August 2, 2013

Fit as Fiddle

(WARNING! WARNING! DO NOT Play this Video! Contains Unhealthy levels of estrogen, which the surgeon general has determined may be hazardous to your health. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!)

As an almost convert to mostly eating paleo, I always have my eye out for healthy articles. When I saw this article about healthy habits of insanely fit people (H/T Instapundit) I had to have a look at it. I was severely underwhelmed.

What raised my ire? The first habit listed was "Fit People Don't Diet". Now as a paleo guy who has lost a lot of weight eating (mostly) paleo, I have to agree with that statement. I am almost never hungry and I don't 'diet'. That being said, they buttressed that statement with this picture of a women who was "owner of the most inspiring arms in America":

I'm sorry. When I think of healthy and inspiring body parts, arms are not at the top of the list. Not to be a nitpicker here, but that particular person has the largest backside of any first lady since... Nope - not going to pre-judge that. I'll do some research and you decide. To be fair, I will try to limit the pictures to when they were in office. Ok, here's a reasonable picture of Michelle:

Now Laura Bush:


Barbara Bush:

(sigh! Guess we can stop there - but i'd like to see what Michelle looks like at that age...). Before that, First Ladies were twigs by comparison - Nancy Reagan, Rosalynn Cater, etc. You'd have to go back to the 1950's and Mamie Eisenhower to get a contender.

Ok - where was I? Oh yeah - 8 healthy habits. Habit number two was "Find a way to enjoy exercise". I can wholeheartedly agree with this one, but I would modify the object(?) a bit to say "Find ways to enjoy exercise". For me selecting a variety of stuff that turns out to be exercise is the key to getting off the computational devices and out to sweat.

Number three is "Don't compare your body to other people's bodies". WHOOPS! Guess I just violated that one - though technically I was comparing other peoples bodies to other peoples bodies. Anyway, this is the kind of non-competitive BS that results in every kid getting trophies at the end of the sports season. Of course you have to compare, otherwise you don't know if you are making progress. Who do I compare myself to? Being mostly narcissistic, I compare myself to myself. When I start to look like I have the thin & fit body I had when I was in my mid 20's, then I'll know I am there. No - I don't really expect to achieve that - it's a goal.

Number four is "Get Sleep". Now that's just filler. Sleep is way down there on my list of things that make me healthy. However a lack of sleep is more a symptom of unhealthy habits than an end unto itself. Staying up all night drinking, eating the whole pig with potatoes, chain smoking - these things will cause you to loose sleep - not the other way around.

Number five is "Cheat". Humm - I thought number one was "Don't Diet" - how can you "cheat" if you don't diet? There is a glaring flaw of logic here. My point here is if you are not dieting, then you can't cheat - it's not in your mindset to just sit down and eat that plate of fries if you are feeling full from eating a handful of grapes. "Cheat" is just not really in your vocabulary if you are eating right.

Six is to "make fitness a priority". Humm - isn't this just restating rule number two (enjoy exercise)? If you really like doing something, you will do it. If you don't you won't. "Making it a Priority" is just a weak kneed weaselly way of putting off doing something you don't really like.

Seven is "Eat Breakfast". This I can agree to, though what you eat for breakfast matters. Frosted Flakes, while a very tasty breakfast, isn't really going to go very far in making you fit. Given the rather stupid and wrong denigration of the egg, I suspect too many people are eating the wrong kind of stuff for breakfast.

The article ends with yet another platitude for number eight "Get support". Here's a clue - if you are staring down a Twinky or standing at an open refrigerator at 2am and all you can think about is that Eskimo Pie sitting there, no amount of 'support' in the world is going to help you. If on the other hand you rely on your own backbone, change your eating habits, go to bed sated by the right kind of food, you'll be sleeping at 2am and that Eskimo Pie will be in some former-President-to-be's fridge where it belongs.

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